youngstero:

my mom went to high school with jamie lee curtis and one time they both got caught smoking pot together and jamie told the teacher it was my mom’s and my mom was suspended and jamie lee got no punishment so think about that next time you want some activia

the laxative yogurt lady fucked over my mom

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katsplanet:

im afraid my online friends are gonna meet me in person and be like “oh”

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beesmygod:

videogamebf:

if video games arent art then explain this

oh my god its back. the light of my life has returned

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alixjay:

cartersostoopid:

remember when the teacher dragged a tv on wheels like this kind of thing

image

and you knew it was gonna be an awesome day

You obviously don’t remember correctly.

You had to push it, not drag it, or this would have happened:

image

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consultingmoosecaptain:

dalekitsune:

the phrase “curiosity killed the cat” is actually not the full phrase it actually is “curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back” so don’t let anyone tell you not to be a curious little baby okay go and be interested in the world uwu

See also:

Blood is thicker than water The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.

Meaning that relationships formed by choice are stronger than those formed by birth.

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a letter from the end of the first week of hogwarts

  • albus severus:dear mum and dad
  • albus severus:i was in the library today
  • albus severus:reading a book about previous heads of hogwarts
  • albus severus:and i would just like to say
  • albus severus:are you fucking serious
  • albus severus:i demand a name change immediately
  • albus severus:just literally anything else please
  • albus severus:fucking dobby kreacher potter for all i care
  • albus severus:sorry for swearing i just
  • albus severus:bloody hell
  • albus severus:yours sincerely,
  • albus severus:aragog fang potter or some shit
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queerchesters:

Listen, I don’t have a problem with heterosexuals, I work with one, I’m just not sure if I’m comfortable with seeing them on t.v. where impressionable young children can see them.

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  • #gay stuff #it's so cute i'm crying omg
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  • #gay stuff
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